When People Blame A Company For Their Own Stupidity

Ok now.

There are some rotten companies out there. A lot of greed and evil going around, yeah yeah yeah. But there are some instances when people will make a list of "reasons why this mega-corp is actually evil" and some of the reasons are just plain stupid.

For example: a popular tech company Crabapple runs a popular app and music service aToons (this is all hypothetical of course). This company has a deal where they get a fourth of in-app profit. Some stupid app aimed at kids like Jenny Has Crabs: Return of the Mother Crab is free on aToons but only to a certain point. After that you have to buy new levels or you have to buy new kinds of shampoos that will fight the crabs effectively. Young little Susie loves this game and loves Jenny, she wants Jenny to no longer have crabs and so she buys a super-shampoo pack for $2.99. Soon she wants to find out if Jenny spread her crabs to Bobby and if the Mother Crab is going to return from the grave. She buys a level expansion for $0.99. After three months and millions of dead crabs, Susie has spent $1,200 on this app.

So naturally her parent (who somehow has been oblivious to the fact that her daughter has been racking up crab cash on her credit card) is outraged and calls Crabapple to demand a refund. They give her one, but they also say, "This is a one-time refund. We will not give you one after this." She gets infuriated and talks to some stupid local news station. They report it, it winds up on Yahoob! News the next day. They spin the story into a "10 Reasons Crabapple Is Not So Great."

But let's break it down here: Susie is probably 8 or 9. Her aPog is full of great apps that she downloads at will. If her parents don't notice the bill being more that $50 a month they don't care. She has this sudden free will to buy whatever virtual shit she wants because no one is closely monitoring her aToons purchases. Thus, she has no concept that her 1000 $0.99 purchases are adding up (or she really doesn't care because she is 8 and money isn't as crucial to her at the moment).

But it is Crabapple's fault because they "target the game towards kids and then make them pay exorbitant amounts which is deceitful." No. How does that make sense. Yes Crabapple allows for apps like this to be sold through their store and they take a percentage of the profit, but so does Cyborg, the major competing entertainment for your phone company. And really, the game developer, We're Going To Take All Your Kids' Money Studios, should be to blame here. They are the ones who are making it "kid-friendly" and making certain things pay-only and others "free."

But in reality, IT'S THE FUCKING PARENTS FAULT!

FIRST, how the hell did you not realize your child has spent over $1000 on a handheld game. aToons sends out a receipt every week which means your child must have racked that up in six days or less. Did you not notice they were glued to their device? Did you not ask them what they were playing? They are 8, did you not ask them if it was free and they were spending money?

SECOND, why do they have free-reign with your credit card!? What is to say they won't buy 20-30 apps in one day? There are apps that cost $8-15 and they could just be like "Cool, imma have all the apps and be the coolest kid at church." You should've password-protected that shit and made them come to you anytime they wanted to make a purchase.

That iCarly special where they talk about the dangers
ofletting your preteen boy borrow your credit card.

THIRD, you're seriously going to get mad at a company because you are an idiot? You had a parenting fail that cost you over $1000. Live with it. Scold your child. Make them work for the pay. Move on with life. Instead you're going to shit all over their face?! AH!

It's like when people win lawsuits for burning their mouths while drinking coffee "It never said it would be hot!" IT'S FUCKING COFFEE! You don't buy a knife, stab yourself, and then say "It never said it would be sharp!

Or once I heard of someone suing because they put their RV in cruise control and the manual never said you had to stay at the wheel. WHAT!? WHO!? WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU GOING TO DO WHILE YOUR CAR "DROVE ITSELF"!? MAKE A SANDWICH? TAKE A SHIT!? WHY ARE YOU EVEN ALLOWED TO BE IN A MOTOR VEHICLE AT ALL!!?

GAH!!!! I just... I just can't.

So what it boils down to is:

-Monitor your kids spending in this new digital age
-Don't be an ass to a company because you fucked up
-Jenny has crabs

Much love!

-Harrison