The Guilt Trip

Ok now. I hate giving and receiving this little piece of bull-shittery. There are some things that people should feel guilty about. Like eating all of the cookies and leaving none for the kids with HIV, making fun of the disabled, or luring men into their apartment, killing them, then eating or molesting their dead bodies (Jeffrey... smh).

But there are some things that people shouldn't have to feel guilty about. Eating cheesecake, playing scrabble, or masturbating to Japanese porn. Was that last comment too much for you? If it was... I'm not sorry.

But really, I hate getting guilt tripped. People are like: "Hey you coming to my pants party?" And I'm like, "No, I want to have my own pants party with pajama pants, a bottle of coke zero, and Spice World at my apartment" And they're like, "WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU LAME! COME DRINK MY CHEAP BEER AND MEET A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WHO WON'T REMEMBER YOU AND NOT LOOK AT MY AMAZING PUG DECORATIONS, BITCH!!!!"

And then I feel guilty. Like I'm being less of a friend, or less of a suitable college kid by staying in. But in all seriousness I just want a night in, do I need to be guilted about that?

But I am not innocent, I definitely guilt people as well! I am like, "Hey person sitting next to me! Have you ever seen Moulin Rouge!?" And they say "No, what's that?" And then I shoot them.

But in all honestly, Moulin Rouge is ten years old, and those kids, who grew up in conservative households that didn't support beauty, shouldn't have to be judged or feel guilty for their ignorance. So I am out start a new leaf. Instead of guilt tripping people for not having seen amazing movies or staying inside instead of going to exercise (we run to Chipotle), I'm going to just say, "Ok, that's cool" and move on with my fucking life. And then my non-fucking life. I will move on with both.

Much love!

-Harrison