Bar Talk

Ok now. I eavesdrop... because a professor once told me that eavesdropping helps you learn. I do not feel guilty about it. From my view, if you're talking loud enough that I can hear it, you intended that information for me too.

But sometimes, especially in a class, I try to tune out some conversations. Such as this one:

Mable: Yo Cletus, did you go to the Drunken Vagina last night?
Cletus: No, the Vag Pad is too far from my fratty-frat. I went to the Orange Douche instead. That way I only have to stumble three blocks instead of six.
Mable: I hear you, I live on the other side of town now, I busted up my knee coming home the other night, I had to have twenty stitches.
Cletus: Well come to the Douche tonight, I'll make sure you get home fine and safe.
Mable: If by 'fine and safe' you mean you'll be stuffing me with your limp penis then I am in!

My bar of choice.

Was that judgmental? NO! BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY HAPPENS! Ok... I changed the names of the bars and she didn't say that last line, but this is an actual conversation. Really? Really?

I must just be a failed college student cause I don't want any part of these conversations. I mean, I like to be like, "Oh yeah, I don't go to the Drunken Vag because the floors are really gross and I feel like vomiting." Or, "G Ave is my favorite bar because the decor and dancing and there are interesting people there." But I don't think I'll ever find myself in a position where I say, "I went to the Vomit Venue last night and tried to fuck some bitches and then realized I was gay."

It's just not my thing.

I wish they would open up a bar called the Drunken Vag here. Even if it was the most disgusting place on campus, I would go frequently just to say I've been to the Vag.

Much love!

-Harrison

P.S. New poll at the bottom.